Monday, October 13, 2008

Delete?

"Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in
you will perform [it] until the day of Jesus Christ." Philippians 1:6


Have you ever written a post that you go back and read later and think.....what was I thinking?? I said all of that?? That is kinda how I felt this morning as I went back and read my Spectator Participant post. It sat with me like a lump in my throat. You all saw the not so pretty side of me and there was certainly a part of that not so pretty side that said...hit the delete button.

Ummm....pride again.

Get rid of that post.....what will people think? (you know all of those acceptance issues come smack dab face to face with me).

And then I saw all of your beautiful comments and words of encouragement. (What a gift we have in the body of Christ!) Thank you to each of you. And God reminded me of all that He was teaching me through my disobedience that weekend...and continues to speak to my heart today. I know that God had a purpose in that post. And even if not one person commented....that was ok...for it is HIS approval I seek. I pray over each and every post and pray that His Words will come forth...not mine. And that in everything I say, He receives the glory....because ohhh how my flesh wants you to like me.

But you know what....I think it is important for us to be real together. I am a work in progress. God works on my heart each and everyday, teaching me more about Him. I can either have a heart hardened to His truth or I can have a heart that is teachable and able to receive.

After the Harvest Crusade....I needed a heart that would receive His correction. I was disobedient. I wanted to serve under my terms and not His.

But you know what is so cool....God uses us even when we mess up. When we humbly repent and receive His correction our relationship is restored immediately. He doesn't dwell on our mistakes. He forgives and He moves on.

Well, onward, I go.

I opened up my email this morning, to an email from one of my neighbors (who mind you was one that God told me to ask to the crusade). She asked if I wanted to start walking together in the neighborhood......and asked if I wanted to go to lunch with her one day this week.

Why me? Not too sure. But I know God has a plan. He will accomplish His plan with or without me. He wants a relationship with her. He wants a relationship with each and every one of us. We were created to be in fellowship with our God and Father. He desires for no one to be outside His presence. I pray, I am obedient this time, to all that He asks of me. That I will boldy share His love whether in word or by example and that His light will shine forth mightily in my neighborhood and to this woman.

I know God brought us to this neighborhood for a reason. You can go to the ends of the earth and preach the Gospel, as there are so many lost and hurting people. Or you can go to your backyard, down your street or around the corner. We are surrounded by mission fields.

My friend, Allyson, was over this weekend and had read my post. She shared something with me something that I have been mulling over. She encouraged me and shared a story with me about a friend of a friend who came to know the Lord. These ladies were friends for over 10 years...one was a believer, the other wasn't. When the non-believer accepted the Lord, she went back to her believing friend and said, "You knew this all these years and never shared it with me?"

Why do we let our pride, our acceptance issues, our SELF....get in the way of all that God wants to do in and through us. How many people have I neglected to boldy share His Truth with because I feared rejection....How would this reflect on me?

Really.....who cares! All that matters is that I am an empty vessel, emptied of self and filled by the Holy Spirit and through His power, I am poured out to all those around me.

If I am empty of self, then I won't worry about how I am received, liked or accepted.

I long for this.

And so, after reading over that post.....if you see some ugliness in me, if you see some brokennes in me....if you see my mistakes and all of my imperfections and struggles....that is ok. I am a work in progress. There is no perfection outside of Christ Jesus.

But, I pray that most of all.....you will see the work that God has done in this selfish, prideful, broken women and that who I am today is by God's grace, His mercy, His never failing love and His redeeming work. To Him be all the glory.

"Meditate upon these things; give thyself wholly to them; that thy profiting
may appear to all." 1 Timothy 4:15

Thank you to each of you who are walking this road with me.

In Christ's love and grace-Stacy

6 comments:

Jill said...

Good Morning Sweet Sister!

Oh Stacy! The honesty, transparency and realness that you shared is what touched lives. God doesn't want perfect people and He surely can't use them if they think they are. In your brokeness others can be made whole. Never stop showing all that you too struggle with the same sins they do. Others can gleen so much wisdom from all that you have walked before them. By His grace look how far you have come. By His grace look how far you are willing to go.

Your faith and love for Him are what comes through - and the pieces of you that you don't like never leave a lasting impression with any of us. We see His beauty turned from the ashes that you had to face. We see a woman who loves her Daddy so much she wants to honor Him in all she does. It is not about any of us judging you. Because then it is about us too. It is about loving you as you are. In that moment of pride don't let the enemy steal what God has done - it is there we can all see the hand of God loving you back to Himself!

BIG BIG HUGS! May the walk with your neighbor bear much fruit as you obediently walk by faith side by side this woman - look her deep in the eyes as we have done many times and simply tell her of His great love. Softly let His words of complete adoration for her leave your lips and watch the Holy Spirit work.

I'm praying for you this morning and rejoicing in the humility you have allowed us to share with you!

I love you and cherish who you are - no need to delete any part! They are all good - even the bad and ugly! It is in them that we grow closer to Him together!

HUGS! Jill

He And Me + 3 said...

Stacy,

I did not think anything about that post except..."I can totally relate, because we have all been there at some point & may still be there". It was letting us know that you are human, that is what is so great about knowing our God. He is forgiving & His Mercies are new every morning. He knows we are going to fall, but He is always there to pick us up. I love that you are so honest & your blog has ministered to me already.
I am so glad that God has opened another door for your to witness on your walks. That is awesome! I will pray for you.
Mimi

Known as Alicia said...

Stacy, I don't think it was the ugliness that we saw. For me, I saw myself. I was reading Beth Moore last week and she said one of the biggest things we struggle with is pride. Thank you for your willingness to be honest and open. I pray that God will give you the courage to reach out to this neighbor. And then may it spread to the rest. Have a great day! Alicia

Amy~Saved by Grace said...

Wow..... you are a true picture of what Christ wants us to be. Thanks for honesty.
My story is up on my blog you can go to it if you wish. I have it in 2 parts..... Answering His Call.

Tricia said...

Praising God for your obedience and your willingness to share what He is doing in your life and teaching you!

Blessings!

Debra said...

Good morning Stacy,

I came by to say hi and meet you because of the sweet award Jill passed out to you and I this morning.

I did not read the post you wrote before..only this one...but can I tell you the most amazing sentence you wrote here that is such a great truth for all of us to remember...THERE IS NO PERFECTION OUTSIDE OF CHRIST JESUS.

We can all strive for excellence, but perfection is the Lord's business and you being humble and open and willing is an awesome thing to witness.

So may your walk with your neighbor bear much fruit. I am a richer person for being here this morning! Blessings to you sweet sister!